A Day That Changes Begin

Today, I experienced a swift of tsunami falling onto my life. It was an undescribable feeling, total loss of words...but I keep telling myself that everything happened for its own reason on God's will. I do not know how to get it solved, neither how to prevent it from falling apart. It was a point whereby everything was at its lowest dot on life's chart. The only thing my heart could tell me is...keep praying and hoping God could answer my deep prayers. I realized there were loads of mistakes, loads of misunderstanding and breakdown in communication that have taken place over the past years, everywhere and anytime along the journey...may it be my own journey or others. Then, the prices to pay are unbearable. There are too many innocent beings involved...the closest ones who care so much, some are their next generation and also the elders who have sacrificed their whole life. I have made enough stands throughout this journey of life, in fighting for things I really want and things I really want for others, to make their world a better place to live in. However, it was so limiting and tight at hands on what I can do.


I feel sorry for all that have taken place. Past was a bygone, but it was full of memories in my mind, heart and soul. There are alot of unanswered and unsolved queries in mind, but guess it was the day I realized how I should put all these stubborness and expectations aside, simply because it really doesn't matter anymore. Sometimes, no matter how deep our love might be, we just couldn't find and reach that point of understanding and balance. Two persons who are seriously in love simply couldn't reach the same channel and the huge gap in communication has changed what you really want in life. That's when real disappointment, sadness, pain, devastation, vunerability and distrust set in and destroying the result we really really wanna see and feel. Sometimes, to think over it deeper, the person could have already made a huge impact and difference in our life, but it was so fated that we couldn't share the same journey together and by letting go, it willl be the best choice for both. It was miserable and real heartache to do so, but then again, there isn't any better choice....is there? I always believe in giving it a go with 100%. . . . but what if, it was already more than my whole heart could ever give and still, the same disappointment sets in? That is when I learn to surrender. And it was at this moment that I feel a great surge of gratitude in the love that I have received and in the kindness and sincerity of your heart. Thanks for the love. Sorry for all those unwanted pasts. I believe whatever that happened along our journey, it happened for a reason on God's will . . . . for all these help in growing and shaping us up more maturely and stronger.

I know in my heart, for every sunset, there is a new sunrise. Changes begin when I choose to think, to see and to feel differently. It's never too late to learn and I am learning to make a difference at every moment that passed me by. "Love is love when you give it away" . . . I will keep you and your love deep in my heart.

LaPearl Weddings

It's wonderful...in taking the first step to pursue my dream today, It is the birthday of LaPearl Weddings!! I know....there are a whole lot of unknowns in front of me right now. But, to brainstorm, to plan and to make-it-happen will be another whole lot of fun, challenges and excitement. How does LaPearl came about? Haha. There was this night, a peaceful nite while both me and my sis were enjoying our foot reflexology and my mind was urging for a name for my to-be-born baby. I told her...come on, I want to name it by tonite and this will be a nite to remember coz One Day in future, I will tell the story of the founder of "LaPearl" to people out there :) Pearl is my lucky stones and in my eyes, it was one of the icon in the Victorian era and La~stands for lavish. I wanna especially thank my sis and dear for making this come true for me, with the supports, encouragements and loads of ideas brainstorming session. I am so looking forward for what lies ahead for LaPearl now ! I am so wishing LaPearl full of prosperity, value and fame with undying hope and faith :)

Voice From Within

The voice from within me...called out as TRUST. What is trust...How to trust...What does it takes to trust? It evolves from faith, confidence, reliance and dependence OR from either way. Trust speaks out loud as it denotes the feeling of Certainty that a person or thing will not fail, that implies depth and assurance in feeling. Faith, something that we can't live without...connotes unquestioning, often emotionally charged belief. It is like planting a seed that require your dedication to shower it with love, care and devotion day by day and holding onto a belief so strong that u know it will blossom fruitfully one day. Confidence...it frequently implies stronger ground for assurance. It only shows up on you when you possess it deep from within. Reliance...connotes a confident and trustful commitment to another. I hear my thoughts and my voice wondering, to whom shall I lay this on? In simple English I wanna hear my own voice from within...at times, I feel painful waves of disappointment and agony. Why does betrayal in trust takes place? We often say, speaking from yourself, looking at the responsible version rather than victimised yourself. BUT, to tell the painful truth, there are times whereby you have no idea what role you played that caused the incident. I often asked GOD from above, it seems like he has never cease testing my strength and endurance BUT neither has he able to break me apart. That's the Beauty of faith. Believing in something or someone could be a painstaking part in life, but it can also be a moment which you discover who you can be for yourself, and for many around you. I pray that the best will soon shower my family in the brightest sunshines ever......

Entrancing into 2011 with Sparkles

Awaiting to bid farewell to year 2010 wiv ah Dear & the heavy crowds @ Curve now makes me realize how much I had experienced throughout the year and how many precious people I have met, those which have made lotsa huge difference in my days ever since. Okay, very much pleased with my year. I have what I had :)

What's Next is the big question ya!
2011 New Year Resolution, outta too many:
1. Swim like a mermaid (kekeke!)
2. Play Violin (childhood dream!)
3. Make my 3rd trip to Europe! I dun care where to!!
4. Win TOTO! I dun care how $!!
5. Achieve my KPI wiv stretching results in BD
6. Dun age & becoming Prettier and Slimmer (kekeke!)
7. Have more fun in My Way!

Yup, Forgiveness is the kindness of love and to forgive own self & others bring us to the next level of integrity. Orite, let's move on and the first step into Year 2011 is Love Myself beautifully :) Fireworks, I'm waiting...so fantasize me into the world of 2011.

The Kindness of Loving

It has been ages since my last post...with all the new changes ever since I walked out from LP in April. The job changes due to my Out-of-the-Comfort-zone moments has a lot of impact in my past few months journey. What lies ahead is yet unknown..??

What am I gonna write about at this hour...? I'm in the thought of love, on my own love relationship, with my heart & my spirit. It has been some time since I last felt I have given unconditionally. Today, I felt the human touch again from a loving couple with their sacred love to their little boy, and there I went...once again, being the giver to people who deserve my giving. None of us has the power to make someone else love us. But we all have the power to give away love, to love others. And if we do so, we change the kind of person we are,and we change the kind of world we live in.

Love to me is...Being kind to myself in moments of stress. When the stresses of life sets in, take a moment & do something kind to myself. Take a bubble bath, MUST comes with lavender aroma and take a long warm soak. Put on my favourite music. Take a much-needed nap. Being kind to ourselves will open our heart and mind again to the doors of possibility and the solutions to problems..I believe. To love yourself, is also to become a possibilitarian. No matter how dark things seem to be or actually are, raise your sights and see possibilities-always see them,for they are always there. Tonite I've also realized & understand that another kind of love is...Guiding others to grow at their pace. Every single individual is different. Guiding & teaching others, whether they are your children, colleagues or partner, is for the purpose of encouraging growth. Allow them the freedom of growing at their own pace - their knowledge will be better absorbed & rejection is unlikely to arise. Being the controller me, this is a great learning. At times, learn to slow down and look out for others that are not at the same pace, look out for things that I could have missed out along the journey.

I believe Love is attending to our inner call for peace. To live on this belief, I must try to make time for solitude. To seek ways to restore peace in myself - a slow walk in the park, a 'leechless' jungle trail walk, meditation while connecting to the nature spiritually will probably be my option. For my own growth as a typical controller, I shall learn to be present to the quiet mind & peaceful heart which then later, practice & recognise that feeling and bring it up in time of stresses. To the next level of wisdom..I shall give in to myself.

"The more tranquil a man becomes, the greater is his success, his influence, his power for good. Calmness of mind is one of the beautiful jewels of Wisdom"

-James Allen-

~ So far yet so Near ~

Yes, I feel the existence,coz it lives within my soul. I believe in myself, no superheroes can win over this strong feeling that I possessed deep inside. "Stay focus, look at me and be focus, don't let the feelings and emotions overtake you, I really want to be there standing in front of you on your graduation, AW or not Im always there with you" - This is wat brought me to advanced, to go thru advanced, to get cradled and lifted up high, and to walked out of advanced into who I am now, into who I want to be in this LP journey. It is You, that I acknowledged making this happen for me. That is one of the greatest thing that is happening to me, really...the greatest love inside me. You know who you are. You taught me, learning to love myself. I dunno who I am to you now, but no matter what, you are the inspiration that lives within me that make me go all out, and make it happen. I wish, one wish, to give you the warmest hug on my 3rd weekend.

Yes, so far but so near.

On My Own

It's an extraordinary excitement, heart-thumping, anxious, nervous feelings with uncertainty that overwhelmed me for last 2 weeks and especially today, coz THIS IS THE DAY... the day I declared as the beginning of my LP journey. I dropped from LP131 with courage and again, I joined LP133 with more courage..coz this time, it's solely ON-MY-OWN. I juz received a sms from Alvin - "Could it be because you going there alone this time?" It could be - I dunno my dear. It's probably true as there are all new people that Im going to meet soon and Im going to go thru this hardcore journey with them whom I have no idea yet...but it's my new possibilities and challenges in life. It's really a mixed emotions. However, I make a stand to myself that Im making this the greatest journey for LP133 !! I feel a pocketful of gratitude to my supportive GLP particularly my sister. I want to make it happen with whatever it takes. Remove all jargons and honour my words with my actions. I kept telling myself there must be a reason Im dropping out from LP131 and making LP133 my LP journey then. Guess it's time to find out now what's the hidden reason and whatever it is, this is going to be my LP journey for my lifetime...let it be the time of my life! About 1.5 hrs more to go...

" I start again go back to one
I'm running things in my way
Can't stop me now, I've just begun
Don't even think about it
There ain't no way about it
I'm taking names, the ones of mine
Yes I'm gonna take my turn
It's time for me to finally stand alone, stand alone

I am not afraid to try it on my own
And I don't care if I'm right or wrong
I'll live my life the way I feel
No matter what I'm gonna keep it real you know
It's time for me to do it "


Very interestingly, I received a msg on 5th Jan 2010 and this is what it's about...

" Nothing is exciting if you know what the outcome is going to be. You keep wanting
to know how things will play out. Keep asking to see the future. God doesn't give
anyone the power to know the future, because life becomes maddeningly boring when
you know everything upfront. So, instead of struggling, enjoy the uncertainty - to
be alive means to not know! "

Eddie called at the rite moment, as usual my best buddy :-

" Do not need to get along and agree with everybody, but be alligned "
" I'm so proud of your courage to go in there again "
" Don suck away those energy and power inside you "

Thanks for all this acknowledgement from you guys, particularly...my lovely sister, Eddie, Kian, Alvin, Debbie, SiauCheng, Alex etc.

So here I come...1st weekend for my LP133 journey.
I am a TRUSTWORTHY, PASSIONATE and LOVING woman :)

The Last Hour of 2009 ~

One more hour...we are bidding farewell to 2009. Time flies in a click of time... especially the second half year, from my birthday onwards. Uncountable ups and downs, good and bad things but I guess all these are an experience in life, good lessons for future. I always asked myself over and over, why things happened repeatedly huh...'See, it happened once again!' and I accepted things happen for a reason, really. I guess things kept occuring because I have not learned the lesson yet. Someone once told me;

When I ask for Strength, God gave me difficulties to make me stronger,
When I ask for Wisdom, God gave me problems to solve,
When I ask for Prosperity, God gave me brain to work,
When I ask for Courage, God gave me danger to overcome,
When I ask for Love, God gave me troubled people to help,
When I ask for Favour, God gave me opportunities
and I have actually received everything that I asked for and I needed...
These are really one of the best quotes that pulled me through. Many people come and go throughout the entire year and I have seen many true colour, various one diverse in characters and I learned to accept things as it comes and goes. I learn to shift myself to the right quadrant in life when I need to be and best thing of all that I learn is to be contented with myself, with life and people surrounding me. I feel really lucky to meet a wonderful bunch of people that stand a great part of my life from September onwards. They give unconditional care, love and great friendship when I need it the most. I learn to enjoy my life the other way, which I have never came across or thought of. I feel the greatest love of all has happened to me :) Thx to AW for all that I gained...

THe best song that inspired me this year - No Boundaries...I would weather the hurricane, there's no boundaries & NOTHING'S GONNA BRING ME DOWN. Thx to AW for my cradle song, a very momentous song that bring a big impact for me - On My Own...I'm wiser now, I'm not the foolish girl I used to be so long ago, I'm stronger now I've learned from my mistake which way to go, and I am not afraid to try it on my own, I don't care if I'm right or wrong, I'll live my life the way I feel, no matter what I'll keep it real... wonderful really, isn't it!

I feel glad to spend more time with my family this year, esp dad and mum. I've posted the most meaningful photo taken this year...during dad's 60th birthday in Sg. I choose to spend this new year at home with dad mum and two monkey nephews...it has been years and years since I last spent my last and first day of the year with dad and mum. I miss the warmth and peacefulness at home. I just recalled that we were out there with many from the family during 2000 millenium countdown 10 yrs ago... time really flies huh.

Em...it's the last quarter to a good closing of 2009...it has been an interesting year, a year of great change, it's hell and heaven, it's a year of TRANSFORMATION! It's an incredible journey that I've grown, mature and shine into another level. I am really grateful to all the loved ones surrounding me...u guys made it happen for me and I believe there will be more opportunities to create by walking into 2010 that welcome us with abundant love, hope, faith, joy, madness nd fun. A compelling desire, with a solid belief, followed by an effective action and most importanty, an iron will to a BETTER 2010... HAPPY NEW YEAR 2010 !!